MMXIX - thank u, next

cover story

The rollercoaster ride that was 2019 saw humankind face many ups and down. 

We yearned for change but didn’t always know how to achieve it. We spoke against injustice, but it often felt like no one was listening. We tried to shoot for the stars but kept crash landing on the Moon. We witnessed the biggest entertainment events of all time but were almost invariably left disappointed. (Also, tomatoes were really expensive, y’all.)

As the Sun sets on the year, here’s a look back at the highs and lows the world experienced in the last 365 days …

January

- Lunar probes: Our continued attempts to turn our Solar System into a junkyard were focused this year on our very own natural satellite. While China’s successful Chang’e 4 did fulfil its mission of becoming the first human-made object to land on the far side of the Moon (January), Israel’s Beresheet (April) and India’s Chandrayaan-2 (September) were much less fortune; the landers of both were destroyed upon impact on the Lunar surface.

- Bezos’ divorce: The world’s richest man became slightly less rich after the most expensive divorce ever. Amazon founder Jeff Bezos and his wife MacKenzie parted ways, ending a marriage that lasted a quarter of a century. Jeff kept 75% of the couple’s Amazon stock, while MacKenzie got 25% of the stock (and, we presume, a lifetime membership of Prime) worth $35.6 billion, making her the third richest woman in the world.

No word yet on who got custody of Alexa.

February

- India-Pakistan tension: (Violators of human rights) India and (makers of fantastic tea) Pakistan came to the brink of war in February. A few days after an attack in Pulwama killed 40 Indian security personnel, India conducted airstrikes – marking the first time that warplanes of either country crossed the Line of Control since the 1971 Indo-Pak war – targeting purported militant camps in Balakot and killing hundreds of imaginary, invisible terrorists. Pakistan retaliated the following day, shot down an actual, real Indian plane, arrested its tea-aficionado pilot, then released him two days after he was captured.

Later in the year (August), India raised concerns after revoking the special status of Jammu and Kashmir and cutting off communication lines in the Kashmir Valley; the plight of the Kashmiris still remains troubling. Pakistan, on the other hand, established the Kartarpur Corridor (October) allowing Indian Sikh pilgrims to easily visit religious locations across the border.

March

- Ethiopia plane crash: Tragedy struck when an aircraft bound for Nairobi crashed shortly after takeoff from Addis Ababa, Ethiopia, killing all 157 people on board in the deadliest aviation accident of 2019.

Earlier in the year (January), Argentine footballer Emiliano Sala died in a light aircraft crash in the English Channel.

- Christchurch shootings: The evil of violence inspired by intolerance reared its ugly head several times in 2019.

In the deadliest mass shootings in modern New Zealand history, a white supremacist gunman killed 51 people and injured 49 in attacks at a mosque and Islamic centre while live-streaming the incident on Facebook.

Weeks later, a series of coordinated suicide bombings at eight locations – three churches, three luxury hotels, and later a housing complex and a guest house – in Sri Lanka on Easter left 259 people dead and over 500 injured (April).

- Billie Eilish’s success: 2019 saw the meteoric rise of 17-year-old American singer (and #1 Justin Bieber fan) Billie Eilish. She became pop’s biggest newcomer when she took out her Invisalign and released When We All Fall Asleep, Where Do We Go?, an album she made with her brother, Finneas O'Connell, in the latter’s bedroom. Led by the inescapable hit ‘bad guy’ (duh!), her debut ended up becoming the most successful album of the year.

2019 also brought fame to Scottish singer Lewis Capaldi, who ruled the year with his debut set, Divinely Uninspired to a Hellish Extent. 

Elsewhere, Lil Nas X ruffled country music feathers with the year’s biggest hit ‘Old Town Road’, Tones and I shone with ‘Dance Monkey’, while Lizzo was 100% that b****. And purveyor of premier beigness Ed Sheeran wrapped up his ÷ Tour which became the highest-grossing and most attended concert tour in history.

April

- Avengers: Endgame release: 2019 was the year of endings. Bad endings. 

After 11 years and 22 films, Marvel’s Infinity Saga culminated in Endgame, the biggest cinematic event that has ever befallen humankind. The film (very, very unsurprisingly) became the highest grossing movie of all time, making nearly $2.8 billion worldwide, and was visually stunning, emotionally exhausting, exhilaratingly tense, and also infuriatingly convoluted and utterly confusing.

But The Rise of Skywalker, the final instalment in the Star Wars sequel trilogy, fared much worse and downright infuriated fans of the franchise (although they were blessed with Baby Yoda earlier this year, so that’s something at least). The final season of the television series Game of Thrones also received ire and saw critical reception plummet with some of the worst-reviewed episodes of the entire series.

2019 was also the year of Disney remakes. Bad Disney remakes.

Dumbo, Aladdin, The Lion King, Lady and the Tramp ...

Uninspired. Hollow. Soulless. Unnecessary. And immensely successful, because us viewers, we’re clearly a bunch of idiots.

- Julian Assange arrest: Cyber activist/Russian stooge/hero journalist/anarchist villain/general pain in America’s behind, Julian Assange was evicted from the Ecuadorian embassy. After nearly seven years of giving him asylum, Ecuador rescinded their protection of the Wikileaks founder, who was then arrested in London and indicted for computer-related crimes and espionage. He now faces possible extradition to the US – where whistleblower Chelsea Manning has also been jailed since May for refusing to testify regarding Wikileaks – and is reportedly in ill health.

May

- UK political turmoil: The never-ending story known as Brexit continued to cause a political kerfuffle in Britain. Theresa May’s resignation led to Boris Johnson’s rise to power, and the country’s third general election in less than five years (December). 

Johnson also got the chance to meet Donald Trump at the G7 Summit (August) where the two leaders supposedly traded notes on hair care.

Also, lots of couples had children. All were equally precious. None of them were more important based on their lineage. Because this is the 21st century.

- Tarder Sauce death: It wasn’t a good year to be a famous cat. The Internet became a sadder place when beloved meme generator Tarder Sauce, a.k.a. Grumpy Cat, died in May, just a month after the death of popular litle creacher Peepee the Cat. A few days later, Pet Sematary star Leo died, only weeks after the release of the film. And famous feline Lil Bub also crossed over the rainbow bridge later in the year (December).

Maru, we’re guessing, spent the year bubble-wrapped in a sterilized room with padded walls.

June

- Politician arrests: Pakistani politicians kept going in and out of prison. 

Asif Ali Zardari was among those arrested over corruption charges.

Altaf Hussain was arrested in London (July) over hate speech charges.

Later in the year (December), Pervez Musharraf was sentenced to death over treason charges.

Meanwhile, Nawaz Sharif was granted bail to pursue medical treatment.

- Hong Kong protests: 2019 was a very turbulent year for Hong Kong. The attempts to force a controversial extradition bill (March) – that raised concerns about China’s ability to arrest political dissents – sparked massive protests in Hong Kong that escalated over the months. By June, hundreds of thousands of people were demonstrating against the statute as well as the ensuing police misconduct. Even though the bill was eventually withdrawn, the protest movement continued for the rest of the year as the government’s approval ratings plunged. 

Protests also grabbed Sudan, where dictator Omar al-Bashir was removed from power (April) amidst unrest. A contentious new citizenship law meant to undermine Muslims also sparked large protests in India (December). Other regions where citizens took to the streets included Venezuela, Haiti, Algeria, Indonesia, Iraq, Ecuador, Catalonia, Chile, and Bolivia. And we also had an Azaadi March in Pakistan (October) to oust Imran Khan over alleged vote rigging and rising inflation; it achieved a whole lot of nothing.

July

- Cricket World Cup: England and Wales hosted the 2019 Cricket World Cup, the tournament that gave us the sporting moment of this – or frankly any – year in the form of the last over of the historic final, where New Zealand lost to their biggest foes: ridiculous ICC rules and poor umpiring. 

August

- Amazon wildfires: The ongoing widespread fires in the Amazon rainforest led to the loss of hundreds of thousands of hectares of forestation and caused international concern in August.

Also, beginning in August, Australia saw massive bushfires that burned millions of hectares. Rescued koala Lewis became a symbol of the devastating fires; his death broke many hearts, while the future of his species remained in danger.

Fire was also responsible for damage to the iconic Notre Dame Cathedral in Paris (April); the historic building sustained serious damage.

September

- Climate change protests: The environmental impact of human activities was a hot topic in 2019, although meaningful change remained elusive.

Extinction Rebellion spent the year using nonviolent civil disobedience to protest against climate breakdown and biodiversity loss. And Swedish teenager and climate activist Greta “How Dare You!” Thunberg – who found a way to skip school and become the envoy of all children everywhere – became the Shouter in Chief of the climate change movement because the most antagonizing, divisive person must be the face of all important issues, obviously.

October

- Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi’s death: Something very big happened in October when a very bad guy was killed. 

Another very bad guy promptly took his place. 

And business as usual.

November

- Air pollution: Airpocalypse struck the subcontinent as India and Pakistan continued their rivalry by competing for the most toxic air in the world. Pollution hit record levels across the border; Delhi ended up with the worst air of any major city in the world. But not to be outdone, Lahore took the title of the world’s most unbreathable city (Number one! Number one!) in November, with air quality several times worse than what is considered safe for humans and animals.

December

- Russia doping ban: The World Anti-Doping Agency slapped Russia with a four year ban from major international sporting events for doping offences. Head dope Vladimir Putin wasn’t best pleased.

- Trump impeachment: Extremely stable genius Donald Trump proved that he was the greatest stupidest of all presidents by getting impeached for abuse of power and obstruction of Congress. Only the third president in U.S. history to be impeached, he now awaits a Senate trial while campaigning for re-election.

And so it went, 2019. Good old 2019. A year that knew it wanted something better but didn’t quite manage to get there.

Now on to the next one.

Happy New Year, everyone! Make it a good one.

- Sameen Amer

Us Magazine, The News International - 27th December, 2019 

In the picture: Knives Out and Charlie's Angels

movie reviews

Knives Out is a fun whodunnit; Charlie’s Angels is an unimaginative retread

Knives Out

Starring: Daniel Craig, Chris Evans, Ana de Armas, Jamie Lee Curtis, Michael Shannon, Don Johnson, Toni Collette, Lakeith Stanfield, Katherine Langford, Jaeden Martell, and Christopher Plummer.

Directed by: Rian Johnson

Tagline: Hell, any of them could have done it.

Rian Jonson pays homage to the classic murder mystery in the new film Knives Out, a riotous whodunnit that is built around a fairly standard plot but delivered with some subversion and much gusto.

Wealthy family patriarch Harlan Thrombey (Christopher Plummer), who has amassed a fortune as a successful crime novelist, invites his dysfunctional family to his mansion for his 85th birthday party. The gathering includes Harlan’s realtor daughter Linda (Jamie Lee Curtis), her unfaithful husband Richard (Don Johnson), and their spoilt son Ransom (Chris Evans); son Walt (Michael Shannon), who runs his father’s lucrative publishing company, his wife Donna (Riki Lindhome, criminally underused), and their son Jacob (Jaeden Martell); and widowed lifestyle-guru daughter-in-law Joni (Toni Collette) and her college-student daughter Meg (Katharine Langford).

But when Harlan is found dead the next morning, his throat slit in an apparent suicide, a private detective, Benoit Blanc (a standout Daniel Craig, sporting an entertainingly bizarre Southern accent), is recruited anonymously by one of the family members to investigate.

As the sleuth tries to figure out what really transpired, the fractures start to surface and the truth is revealed about each of the trust fund kids who are either desperate to protect their inheritance or hiding a secret. Everyone, it turns out, is a suspect.

Upon discovering that Harlan’s nurse Marta (Ana De Armas) is incapable of lying since she has a “regurgitative reaction to mistruthing” (if you are sensitive to onscreen vomiting, then this is not the film for you!), Blanc asks her to assist in his investigation. 

Like Cluedo meets Columbo by way of Agatha Christie, Knives Out spends two hours trying to amusingly unravel its mystery.

The movie’s fantastic cast keeps you riveted to the proceedings (even when they require some suspension of disbelief); they are all fun to watch and terrific in their respective parts despite the fact that some of them aren’t always given the chance to properly shine. Rian Johnson assembles a stellar group of A-listers, then pretty much hands the movie to the relatively lesser-known Ana de Armas; it’s an odd (but clearly intentional) choice, and while it works since the actress is winsome in her star-making role, it also keeps the wheel of suspicion from spinning as teasingly as it could have.

Its sharp wit is one of the film’s strengths; there are some running jokes that work brilliantly while dissecting prejudice and privilege. Its setting, however, could have used some Wes Anderson-like charm. Also, while there are a few interesting twists and turns, its ultimate big reveal is a tad predictable, and what fools the villain at the end certainly won’t fool the audience.

All in all, Knives Out may not be a gamechanger, but this amusing, entertaining mystery is still a whole lot of fun

Rating: 3.5 out of 5

*****

Charlie’s Angels

Starring: Kristen Stewart, Naomi Scott, Ella Balinska, Elizabeth Banks, Djimon Hounsou, Sam Claflin, Noah Centineo, and Patrick Stewart

Directed by: Elizabeth Banks

Tagline: Sworn to secrecy. Bound by sisterhood.

Charlie’s Angels return to the big screen for a belated continuation of the film series with a new cast and a new director but the same old hackneyed action comedy beats and nary an inventive element in sight.

The Angels have now gone international, recruiting crime-fighting lady spies to take down criminals around the globe. “Bosley” is revealed to be a rank in the organization; as senior operative John Bosley (Patrick Stewart) retires, he is honoured at a party thrown by Rebekah Bosley (Elizabeth Banks), Edgar Bosley (Djimon Hounsou), and the rest of the gang.

When a threat emerges, two Angels – rebellious Sabina (Kristen Stewart) and former MI-6 agent Jane (Ella Balinska) – are put together to help Elena (Naomi Scott), an engineer who has worked on the Calisto project, creating a device that can provide clean, sustainable energy but due to a flaw can also be weaponised. Calisto has the potential to cause havoc, and it is up to the Angels to keep it out of the wrong hands. 

What should be an exciting thriller, soon turns into a fairly formulaic caper. It’s all very joyless and listless. There is nothing distinctive about Banks’ direction. The story is conventional. The action elements are subpar. The wit falls flat. 

The acting talent of the leads isn’t exactly stellar either. Stewart does stand out and delivers a somewhat entertaining performance, but the group just doesn’t connect like they should, and lacks the charisma or star power to draw in an audience. 

To make this revival work, the project would have needed a more distinctive storyline, inventive touches, sharp script, and a charming cast – elements that this movie simply does not possess. As it stands, Charlie’s Angels may offer the occasional moment of fun, but the film really doesn’t warrant a trip to the cinema. With a better script and cast and a more versatile director, the adventure could have been a lot more entertaining.

Rating: 1.5 out of 5

- By Sameen Amer

Instep, The News on Sunday - 15th December, 2019 *

Finding Jolly

cover story

In the fall of 2015, Kitty, the daughter of our lovely resident stray Fringe, made her way into my room, discovered an empty cat house, decided it now belonged to her, and promptly moved in.

On March 27, 2016, Kitty gave birth to two beautiful kids, Lucky and Jolly, who instantly became my trusty little sidekicks.

On October 29, 2019, Jolly disappeared without a trace.

*****

About a cat

Jolly is an energetic, playful cuddle monster and purr machine who also happens to be a fairly staunch misanthrope. She inherited Kitty’s distrust of humans, and, channeling her inner Sven, came to the conclusion that every one of ‘em’s bad, except, of course, me. “Instead of loving lots of humans a little bit each, I’ll love this one weird lady a whole lot,” she decided, and I reciprocated by raising her like a little child and turning her into a complete spoiled brat. As you do.

But I think nature sent her to me, in its infinite wisdom, because Jolly was going to need a bit of extra help to survive. When she was 1, Jolly started having coughing spells, and it soon became obvious that my fur baby had very severe feline asthma. She was coughing around 10 to 15 times a day, as many as 20 on really bad days, and not responding to any treatment. In August last year, she had two near-fatal asthma attacks, after which her vet, Dr. Faheem, put her on a twice-daily inhaler regimen which has helped immensely by healing her lungs and giving her the chance to return to her normal, impish self.

In part because of her illness, my asthmatic kitty has been raised as a strictly indoor cat (who occasionally manages to sneak out despite our best efforts), and, while she has access to the roof where she can soak up the sun and make amusingly futile attempts to terrorize birds, she is rarely allowed to go outside, much to her chagrin.

On October 29th, I made the mistake of giving in to her nagging and letting her out.

*****

Day 1

Jolly left the house at around 11:30am. I saw her at noon, sitting happily on the pillar next to our gate, adamantly refusing to come back inside. A few minutes later, she had simply vanished.

The fact that she rarely stays outside for more than an hour meant that all the red flags were soon very raised. A neighbour’s guard last saw her at 2pm, after which there was simply no sign or sighting of her.

When she wasn’t back by the evening, I did the most logical, practical, pragmatic, productive thing I could possibly do: I burst into tears.

By the time night rolled around, I was full-on Viola Davis-style crying. There was no sign of Jolly anywhere in the immediate vicinity, and I was certain I’d never see her again.

Day 2

By the next morning, Jolly’s disappearance had turned into a complete mystery.

Jolly is scared of pretty much everything - humans, loud noises, big vehicles, her own shadow - and she isn’t accustomed to surviving out on her own. She was definitely in trouble, but what kind, we weren’t sure.

It was a case fit for a Hercule Poirot investigation. But since I couldn’t hire Poirot, seeing how he isn’t real, I thought I’d do the next best thing and search for her myself. Even if something had happened to her, someone somewhere must have seen her at some point.

Just as I was about to start my sleuthing, the lovely Sun entered my life like the beam of light she truly is. A devoted pet parent to an adorable Yorkshire Terrier, she saw a fellow animal lover in anguish and offered to help me look for my fur child. And so I temporarily paused my crying, and we set off, Sun and I, to find my missing four-legged friend, ringing every doorbell, asking everyone if they’d seen Jolly, shoving a photo of her into their unsuspecting faces.

And to my absolute surprise, it turned out that most of the people we came across were … really nice. Shocking, I know! Humans and nice! Who’da thunk!

Some showed concern and said they’d keep an eye out for her; some invited us to search in their yards. There were, however, a few who were just uninterested, and only one lady who seemed to genuinely rue our very existence, but as Sun pointed out, her lack of hospitality was her problem, not ours.

Hours of searching later, while my faith in humanity had been thoroughly restored, my cat’s whereabouts were still a mystery.

My mom and dad were concerned Jolly might have stowed away in someone’s car. My friend Hazel thought Jolly must be locked in a nearby detached or spare room. My Aussie sister Anny was convinced Jolly had been abducted by aliens, which, at this point, seemed like the most plausible explanation for her disappearance.

It would eventually turn out that Hazel’s guess was the closest. Jolly wasn’t locked in a room, but she was, indeed, stuck.

Day 3

Several of my astoundingly kind neighbours were looking for my cat at this point. And true to their word, the wonderful individuals who had shown concern for her the previous day did indeed keep an eye out for her. A number of times people showed up at our house thinking they’d found her, but they had invariably spotted some other kitty (who would most often turn out to be Button, one of my strays).

It was early evening when our neighbour’s driver, the same person who had last seen her nearly two days ago (and who is clearly the MVP of this story), came to our place and said he had found Jolly. I was sure this was going to be yet another Button sighting, but then he said the words “fan” and “stuck” and “definitely your cat”. 

OMG.

OMG. OMG. OMG.

Two doors down, crammed into a small space behind an exhaust fan around two storeys high, I saw a scared, starving, dehydrated feline - my Jolly. The family who lived in a hut in the mostly empty plot next door (and who were well aware that a cat was missing in the area) had known about her whereabouts since the day before and had done nothing to help her.

Now look … *steps on a soapbox* when you see an animal in trouble, here’s what you should do: something. Here’s what you should definitely not do: nothing. If Spider-Man has taught us one thing (and he clearly hasn’t, as you can see), it’s that with great power comes great responsibility. You know those opposable thumbs that we’ve been blessed with? They come with the responsibility to help those who haven’t had our evolutionary luck. If we see a creature in distress, we’re meant to help, not stand by and watch it slowly die like some kind of psychopaths. *steps off the soapbox*

So, anyway, my silly imp had managed to get herself stuck while exploring the neighbourhood. She couldn’t jump down; she doesn’t do heights. She couldn’t go back up; again that was a whole storey high. She had spent two days cooped up in a small hole with no food, water, or asthma medication, and had endured the sun during the day and the cold during the night. It’s a miracle she was still alive.

My amazing neighbours - mostly people I had never even met before - quickly sprung to action and brought ladders and poles and came up with rescue schemes that were never going to work and were immediately vetoed by yours truly. Our best bet was to convince the resident of the house to remove the exhaust fan, which, after some prodding, he did. 

But when she noticed that someone was tinkering with the fan and saw the number of people who had gathered outside, my little girl completely freaked out. Turns out, there is one thing she’s more scared of than death: humans. 

She jumped. (Gasp!)

Thankfully she landed safely (whew!), then ran straight for home, beelining for her water bowl as soon as she got in, after which she pretty much collapsed on the bed. With the ordeal her body had been through, it would take her weeks to be able to eat properly, and a whole month to fully recover.

*****

And that is how a group of totally random people came together to help me find my missing cat and reaffirm my faith in humanity along the way. I did not think anyone would care about my lost pet, and I could never have imagined so many strangers would be willing to offer a helping hand. 

Where I expected indifference, I found kindness. When I thought there was no hope, I found support. 

People still ask how Jolly is doing. Just the other day, a neighbour inquired if I found my cat and then wanted to know all the details of her rescue. Maria and Sahil, the kids who very enthusiastically helped look for her, now wave to me whenever they see me. Sun even brought lots of presents for Jolly and is glad that my furry friend and I have been reunited.

As for Jolly herself, she is obviously grounded for life now, although I’m not sure she knows that, seeing how she keeps sneaking out of the house all the time anyway. Could someone please convince her that she’s meant to be an indoor cat? Because I really don’t need another practical demonstration of the goodness of humanity!

- Sameen Amer

Us Magazine, The News International - 13th December, 2019

In the picture: Frozen II and Klaus

movie reviews

Frozen II is visually stunning but narratively muddled; Klaus is heartwarming albeit fairly predictable

Frozen II

Starring (voices): Idina Menzel, Kristen Bell, Josh Gad, and Jonathan Groff

Directed by: Chris Buck and Jennifer Lee

The ever-growing list of unnecessary Disney sequels gets a little longer with the release of Frozen II, the follow-up to the studio’s 2013 musical megahit that fails to recapture the magic of its predecessor.

The film takes us back to Arendelle where Queen Elsa (voiced by Idina Menzel), her sister Princess Anna (Kristen Bell), their sentient snowman Olaf (Josh Gad), Anna’s boyfriend Kristoff (Jonathan Groff), and Kristoff’s reindeer Sven are about to embark on another adventure.

A mysterious voice starts calling out to Elsa, who then ends up awakening the magical spirits of an enchanted forest her parents had warned her about, thereby putting Arendelle in danger. The past, it turns out, is not what it seems; a wrong demands to be righted, and it is up to the sisters and their companions to venture into the forest, find the origin of the mysterious voice as well as Elsa’s magical powers, and save their kingdom.

The journey, which doesn’t seem particularly inspired to begin with, soon turns into a convoluted mess. 

On the plus side, Frozen II is visually beautiful. There are moment of mirth - mostly provided by Olaf - that work well; the snowman’s summary of the previous film is perhaps this installment’s highlight. And there are some interesting themes embedded in the story about embracing change and doing the right thing.

But the storyline overall feels forced and clunky. Pacing issues plague the adventure throughout; some parts drag on while others feel rushed. The emotional impact is diminished by what is perhaps the film’s biggest flaw: its inability to fully embrace its darkness and deliver the consequences the tale requires.

The soundtrack, too, isn’t as strong this time around. Although the songs have, once again, been crafted competently - and you really can’t expect anything less from the very talented Robert Lopez and his wife Kristen Anderson-Lopez - the tunes just aren’t as memorable. With tracks like ‘Into the Unknown’, the songwriters seem to be trying to come up with another showstopper in the vein of ‘Let It Go’ by following the same musical formula that brought them success previously, and that ends up making the results less special. Somehow the film’s catchiest song is ‘Lost in the Woods’, an amusing ‘80s-inspired power ballad (sung by Kristoff, a character the movie has no idea what to do with) that couldn’t care less about the fact that it is completely at odds with the vibe of the rest of the film and sounds so much like Chicago that Peter Cetara and co. practically deserve royalties for it.

On the whole, Frozen II doesn’t leave you with the sense that it was created because Disney had an essential, interesting tale to tell. Instead, a story seems to have been forced together to make a sequel that didn’t necessarily need to exist. It has some enjoyable moments, but this sequel ultimately pales in comparison to the original. 

Rating: 2.5 out of 5

*****

Klaus

Starring (voices): Jason Schwartzman, J. K. Simmons, Rashida Jones, Joan Cusack, Will Sasso, and Norm Macdonald

Directed by: Sergio Pablos

Tagline: Welcome to the jingle.

Santa Claus gets a fictional origin story in Klaus, a lovely animated comedy that delivers the message of kindness while spreading some Christmas joy.

The film revolves around the spoiled and lazy Jesper (voiced by Jason Schwartzman) who comes from a wealthy family and has no ambition or work ethic. To teach him a lesson, his father sends him to the frozen town of Smeerensburg where he must work as a postman and process 6000 letters in a year or else he will be cut off from the family fortune.

Delivered to a cold, distant island by a snarky boatman (Norm McDonald), Jesper quickly ends up in the crosshairs of the feuding locals and discovers that the town is divided into two warring factions that are at each other’s throats. Desperate to fulfil his mission so that he can leave the gloomy town, Jesper convinces a woodsman named Klaus (J. K. Simmons) to donate the toys he has made to children who will ask him for the gifts through letters, and enlists a teacher named Alva (Rashida Jones) to help the kids learn to write. His scheme begins to work, but the effects of his plan inspire consequences that he did not anticipate.

Its overall storyline may be fairly predictable, but the tale is brought to life with such heartwarming spirit and offbeat style - like The Emperor’s New Groove meets Tim Burton for Christmas - that it’s impossible to resist the film’s charm. The movie’s strengths include its artistic direction, terrific animation, well-suited voice performances, and an entertaining script. 

Where Klaus majorly falters, though, is in pairing its unique vibe with the generic pop monstrosity ‘Invisible’, a grating misstep that takes you out of an otherwise charming viewing experience when it needlessly appears in the film. It almost feels like the filmmakers were forced to add a commercial element to a movie that didn’t need such tonal dissonance.

Still, Klaus succeeds in creating a lovely Christmas episode about kindness and generosity. Sure you know where the story is going, but the journey is delightful nonetheless.

Rating: 3.5 out of 5

- By Sameen Amer

Instep, The News on Sunday - 8th December, 2019 *